自痺

It seems like a sad love posting... but it really is not... Read on please... It is important!

我拒絕異常現象
希望一切如同往常
平淡會少一點傷

我拒絕擁抱
對愛距離抱持一定
像一雙筷子 靠近卻不在一起

我的世界 自己對自己
不要來打擾 不要來試著了解
以為你會明白 你不會

我自己對著自己
我表達 我明白
你永遠無法喚醒已經沉睡痲痺的感覺

你那像滿園子里枯落的葉 的眼淚
我不能體會 不能感覺
不要哭 不要浪費眼淚
冷冷的心對待你的心碎

如果我是自痺 以上的表達不能畫上據點
也沒有開始的機緣 為你落一滴淚

The above post reflects my feelings for the people with autism. Never enough that i write could ever express the feelings they have and the hardships and struggles they go though every single day. I hope the posting would be able to raise some awareness among my friends about autism. Got the inspirations from a show on channel U or channel 8 recently about autistic people and it affected me badly enough to want to share my thoughts and how i feel.

These shows made me realise just how lucky i am. To have to just experience 1% of what the parents and the autistic child go through would have severely crippled me. What am i to continue pursuing the seemingly "important" things in my life? Maybe they will have a less significant importance from now on? I don't really know. I may fall back to the realm of darkness, into the depths of trying hard to achieve something that always remain elusive...

For the moment it set my sights shorter, and it is a good thing. I feel less need to walk further when i see nearer. I take a step at a time at my pace enjoying the sceneries along the way. I don't want to play the games you guys play. It makes me very tired sometimes. I want to rest...